


Circumstance

by cealchylle



Category: Push (2009)
Genre: F/M, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-20
Updated: 2012-08-20
Packaged: 2017-11-12 13:36:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/491629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cealchylle/pseuds/cealchylle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>5 kisses in 5 rooms: the evolution of Nick and Cassie's relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Circumstance

I.

When Cassie is 14, she and Nick have a terrific argument.  She's shouting at him and her face is turning red and they can probably hear it down the block, but she doesn't care.  There are a million things wrong with her life and Nick is about to make it a million and one.  How could he do this to her?  She hates Kira.  She's scared to be alone.  And he's the only one she has left.

"I told you, it's _changed!_   It's too dangerous now, you can't go!"

"Cassie," Nick says, all calm determination, and she wishes he would just shout back at her.  "I have to go.  I _owe_ her that."

Cassie doesn’t see how Nick could owe Kira anything.  It's not like she ever saved his life.  She left him for _dead_.

"I want to go with you," she says defiantly.

" _No_.  I'm not putting you in that kind of danger."

"You're not responsible for me."

"Cassie, please," and the tone of his voice is the thing she hates most.  Sad and frustrated with a hint of patronizing.  "You have to trust me."

"You're the one who won't trust _me!_ "

"I do trust you.  That's why I'm bringing extra ammunition."  This would be funny in another life, another universe.  But not here, not now.

"You know, for a smart guy you're really stupid," and she knows she's lost this one.

He only shrugs in response.  He knows too.

All the anger drains out of her and leaves her empty.  Cassie tries to fight it, but tears spring up in her eyes.  "I don't want you to leave me."

Nick looks pained.  He puts his arms around her and gives her a squeeze.  "I will come back," he says into her hair.  He pulls back to look her in the eye, his hands warm on her shoulders.  "Trust me, Cassie.  I would never leave you."

She looks back at him and sniffs in reply.  He kisses her forehead and her eyes close briefly.  She feels the wetness of his lips.  As he turns away, she thinks to wipe it off, but doesn't.  This is the first time Nick has ever kissed her.  So she watches him go without another word and trusts in her heart that he'll come back to her.

He does come back.  With Kira in tow.  They're both a little bashed up, but nothing a good stitch can't handle.  Cassie looks into the future and she knows what will happen next.  There is too much broken between Nick and Kira for them to ever repair.  No way to fix it, and no way to turn back the clock.  Kira will leave them.  She wants no part of this war.  And Nick will move on.  Cassie isn't sorry at all.

 

II.

When Cassie is 16 she goes through a phase.  She feels so much older than she is, than everyone treats her.  She's mature, you know?  Certainly fucked up enough and wise beyond her years from all this watcher crap.  So she wears too much makeup and tight, revealing clothes.  Nick doesn't say anything, he never tells her what to do because she'll do it anyway.  He just purses his lips and raises an eyebrow sometimes.

And yeah, she wants attention.  She gets it, too.  From boys eyeing her in the streets or catcalling from cars.  It feels nice, to be noticed that way.  It feels even nicer when it gives Nick a murderous look in his eyes.

At this particular moment she's walking down a city sidewalk by herself, not really sure what she's looking for.  There's a guy in a leather jacket offering her a cigarette, which she declines.  As she passes a dark, grungy storefront, her head throbs with a vivid vision.  It's her and Nick's room and there is blood _everywhere_.  And Nick is- Nick is-

She starts running, pounding the pavement, the straps of her heels cutting her feet sharply, but it doesn't slow her down.  She bursts through the door when she gets there and the gruesome scene floats before her vision before fading away.

Nick is looking at her in surprise and concern.  She must look ridiculous, all hot and sweaty from running, makeup smudged, with her feet cut up and bleeding.

"I thought- I saw something," she gasps as her body propels forward into his arms.  "I thought you were dead."

And he is holding her tightly, his chin resting on the top of her head.  She sinks into him, her heartbeat steadily calming.  They stand just like that a minute or so, then she looks up.  He meets her eyes and his face is hard but so full of affection and she feels so much.  She feels scared and lost and safe and loved and it's too much to hold.

Some overwhelming impulse grabs her and she finds herself reaching up and kissing him on the mouth.  Nick freezes.  He doesn't pull away, doesn't move a muscle.  He just stands there and lets her kiss him.

She presses her lips more insistently, searching for something maybe.  But she gets nothing in return and finally pulls away.  Nick gazes down at her and his eyes have a look that punches her gut.  He looks sad, maybe pitying and she can't stand it.  She breaks out of his hold and is out the door before he can call after her.

Cassie ignores the stinging at her eyes and kicks off her strappy heels on the sidewalk.  She continues barefoot down street after street, heedless of where she goes.  This is the stupidest, most reckless she's ever been.  The shame and embarrassment are making her nauseous and she can't go back there, not yet.

But she will.  He'll be packed and ready to go by the time she gets back.  And he'll try to talk to her, but she'll tell him she doesn't want to talk about it.  And they'll go back to some semblance of normality.

 

III.

When Cassie is 17 she and Nick get drunk together.  She hasn't seen anything for weeks, so Nick has taken it upon himself to teach her proper drinking skills.  He doesn't mind so much now that she drinks alcohol, but he doesn’t want her doing it alone.

Cassie really wants this to work, but at the same time, her mind is growing fuzzier and fuzzier.  She falls back on her bed laughing hysterically at something Nick said.  Something that wouldn't even be funny if they were sober, and now Nick is cracking up too.

He drops back to lay down beside her.  In this moment Cassie doesn't care anymore about visions.  She only wants to cuddle closer to Nick, soft and warm and light-headed.

He turns on his side toward her and it's like they've created some secret space between them.  "So, do you see anything?" he asks.

And Cassie's feeling giddy and goofy so she inches closer and presses her forehead to his.  "I see you," she smirks.

He doesn't pull away, just smiles back.  That brilliant Nick smile, and Cassie is suddenly struck by how much she wants him.  Has, in fact, been in love with him since they met.  So while simultaneously thinking too much and not thinking at all, she closes the gap between them and kisses him.

Just like the first time, Nick doesn't respond and Cassie begins to feel the sting of mortification creeping up her spine.  Until he moves.  His hand gently holds her face and he kisses her back.  And she wonders whether this is only because he's so drunk that his inhibitions have fallen away but it doesn't matter because _Nick is kissing her back_.

Her whole body responds to him.  Chills and a fiery sensation spreading through every nerve.  Her hands cling to him and she never imagined it could feel quite this good.  His fingers are running through her hair, his lips moist against hers, his stubble scratching her chin.

They kiss just like this, no words, just breaths and soft sighs.  Eventually, entwined together, they fall asleep.

In the morning, there is no mention of their late-night make-out.  Nick just points to a bag of greasy donuts saying, "Got you some breakfast, kiddo." _Kiddo?_   What the fuck?  He never calls her that.

Cassie knows he must remember and must regret it, and she wants to berate him for acting the way he does sometimes, _all the time_ , but she sucks it up.  Perhaps the best thing to do is wait.

 

IV.

When Cassie is 18 she has a breakdown.  She has literally seen and drawn hundreds of versions of Nick's death, but for some reason this latest one gets to her, a sketch drained of color because she lost most of her markers a few weeks back.  She begins to cry and Cassie tells herself she doesn't _CRY_.  She isn't some weeping child, this is not who she is.  But she can't help it, maybe this is a hormonal thing, maybe she's been having a tough week, a tough year, a tough life.

She hugs her knees to her chest and sobs.  Harder than she ever has in a long, long time.

Nick comes in carrying their dinner and sees her on the bed.  He drops his bags immediately and goes to her.  He sits down and rubs her back murmuring, "It's ok, Cassie.  Cassie, it's ok.  I'm here.  I'm here."

Slowly, the heaving sobs stop and nothing is left but hiccups.  Cassie smiles at him weakly.

They decide to sleep together that night.  There are two beds, there are always two beds, but Cassie doesn't want to leave his side right now, not even for a bit and Nick obliges.

In the dark, they lie on their backs next to each other and Cassie is hyper aware of Nick's body, of the invisible line dividing their sides of the bed.  She can't sleep and the minutes tick by.

Finally, she squints in the light as Nick reaches to flip the lamp on.  "Do you want to talk about it?" he says to the ceiling.

Cassie looks over at him and he turns his head to gaze back.  "Not really," she hesitates, "I was just...freaking out, it's not really a big deal."

He frowns like he's trying to read something in her eyes, but then stretches his arm out and invites her to curl up against his side.  She's there in a heartbeat and his arm goes around her.

"You don't have to keep it all inside, Cassie," he says, quiet.  "That's why I'm here.  And you know I'm not going anywhere."

"I know," she whispers back.

He is searching her face again, to make sure, she supposes, that she is clear of doubt.  That his words have indeed reassured her.  In this moment she feels strangely young, but also more of a woman than she has in her entire life.

His thumb comes up to sweep along her eyebrow, her cheek, and the corner of her lips.  Her heart hammers in her chest, so loudly that she's sure he must hear it too.  Then Nick does something she never saw coming, and she thought her powers had improved more than that.

He pulls her closer and kisses her deeply.  As shocked as she is, she has no trouble responding back in kind.  They are both so aware and she feels her body flush because this is really happening.

They roll so that she is half on top of him, his hands at her back, her knee pushing between his legs, when she starts up, her eyes squeezed closed.

"We have to go, now," she tells Nick as the vision passes.

Nick knows by now to trust her sense and they are up and packing without further ado.  They've become very efficient at this routine.  Nick moves clothing and shoes into a suitcase from across the room at the same time as he checks the drawers in the nightstand.  They are on a bus in under 45 minutes.

As the bus trundles along a bumpy road, Cassie dozes off against Nick's shoulder and wonders vaguely what would have happened between them had they not been interrupted.

 

V.

Cassie is 19 when they have their first major victory.  With the help of other rogue psychics, they take down a major Division lab in Nevada.  The same lab where Cassie's mother is being held.  A brief tearful reunion later and then she is on a plane, heading south past the equator.  It's safest for them to split up.  Nick and Cassie will meet up with her again in about a week, a week that stretches far too long for Cassie's taste, but at least she has Nick.  All that's left to do now is celebrate.

They come loudly through the door of the room they've been staying in.  There is only one bed now.  The fact that he's almost 30 and she's still a teenager is something that has never bothered Cassie and it stopped bothering Nick some time ago.  They've become a couple of sorts, though in most ways it feels like nothing has changed at all.

There is one thing, though, that they've never done and Cassie feels like she has waited long enough.

As soon as they're inside, she jumps on him, her small frame easily wrapping around him as his arms come up to support her.  The force of it pushes him back against the door.

And she is pressing their mouths together more intensely than she ever has before.  She tastes him till they are both breathless, then climbs down and lifts off his shirt while Nick is too dazed to respond.  Hair adorably ruffled, she walks him forward by the waistband.

"Cassie...," he says as she strips off her own clothing, "are you sure about this?"

"Oh, I'm sure."

And she is, completely, because she knows how this future goes.  It's so good and her limbs feel like they're buzzing with electricity.

He runs his hands along her bare sides.  "I knew you'd be my downfall from the moment I met you," he says, lips quirked.

"Oh, Nick," she says, as she pulls him down, sly smile and long lashes fluttering. "You just made it so easy."

Cassie surprises herself with her eagerness.  Her fingers trace the shape of his chest above her.  Nick kisses her sweetly, like always, but his hands are tense and hesitant, afraid that if he touches her she might melt away before his eyes.

"Don't worry.  You won't break me," Cassie whispers in his ear.

He chuckles nervously, but relaxes.  Even though this is new for her, Cassie has no apprehension.  And it feels like the most natural thing in the world, their bodies coming together like this.

Cassie never could have foreseen this when she first met Nick, yet now she can't imagine ending up any differently.

With Nick beside her and her mother waiting not far off, she experiences a rare emotion: joy.  And as she acknowledges the feeling, she hopes with all her heart that it will last, because in a world where so many things are wrong, she knows that this is right.


End file.
